The Promise to Mischief
by Azurewing92
Summary: I remember a smile, his smile. Did I smile back? But, the one thing I remember most was the promise I made. I can't remember my own voice, or his voice in return, just the words. "Don't worry, I'll protect you! No matter what, okay?" Looking back, that was probably the start of it all. Loki/OC First Person. Rated for violence, language, and suggestive themes.
1. Chapter 1

_I have written this fanfiction from the idea that popped into my head. I, in no way, am responsible for the creation of the plot of Thor, nor any of its characters. I have merely introduced my own character into the plot in which some things may have changed. This work on a large part is not original. I am only responsible for the OC character._

* * *

When I was a small child, my mother was summoned to reside in the palace of the mighty Allfather. She was renowned for her healing capabilities and it was thought to be beneficial to have her remain close. I don't remember much, but I do remember a boy. Dark hair amongst a group of light headed children. They were being spoken to by Allfather. I can't remember what was being said. There wasn't anger, just a firmness that qualified it as a lecture. When Allfather walked away all the light headed-ones turned to the other boy and one even shoved his shoulder slightly. They gathered around him, upset. I remember him being left alone, crying in anger; a seething anger that is now more than just a memory. I had knelt down next to him. He had emerald eyes. What had I asked? What had I said? I remember a smile, his smile. Did I smile back? But, the one thing I remember most was the promise I made. I can't remember my own voice, or his voice in return, just the words.

"_Don't worry, I'll protect you! No matter what, okay?"_

Looking back, that was probably the start of it all.

* * *

Today is a glorious day in Asgard, for a son of Odin is to become the new King and protector of the nine realms. Thor Odinson, after many, many years as an accomplished warrior and wielder of Mjolnir, shall ascend to the throne. Hundreds of thousands of Asgardian citizens are crammed into the ceremonial hall, their cheers roaring off the golden walls. They all love their crown prince. Not that there isn't much to love about Thor. He's handsome, a brilliant warrior, and an excellent friend. I have known him for many years and can attest to that! He is one of my closest friends, and today I could not be any more proud of him.

He's walking toward us along the long stretch of red carpet, waving and cheering along with the citizens. As is his nature, he cannot resist showing off for them even if just a bit. I roll my eyes at his antics and I hear Sif mutter to herself beside me. I bump her slightly with my shoulder. "Oh, let him enjoy his day. He's been waiting for this for years."

Sif smiles to herself and continues to watch Thor as he waves and calls out to his people. I smile as well and lean in closer to her and whisper "It's not as if you don't enjoy it." Her shoulders tense slightly and she nudges me. "Quiet, Astra." I have known for a rather long while that Sif is, shall we say, sweet, on Thor. And while I express my opinion that she should let her feelings be known, she remains steadfast in her desire to keep it hidden. It is not my place to say anything to Thor for her, so what else can I do but tease her affectionately every now and then?

As Thor draws closer to us, I chuckle and glance back to briefly to the man standing only one step above me. Loki is already looking at me. I smile at him, and he smiles back briefly before rolling his eyes and returning his gaze to his brother. While I am not a person of dignified rank, only a healer, I have been given the privilege of standing with the royal family. Due to my mother's friendship with the Queen, I have been close to them for some time. However, after the death of my mother, Queen Frigga saw it upon herself to bring me under her personal care. From that moment on, I was regarded as one of the family. I have known Thor and Loki for as long as I can remember, but there isn't a memory that I still hold that does not include Loki in some way. There is no other being in all of Asgard whom I know better, and none who know me just as well.

Thor reaches his destination at the bottom of the steps, right before me. He kneels, removes his helmet and smiles up at his mother. He winks at her, but I am unable to see her reaction. I imagine it must be comical for Thor's smile only widens. After a few moments, Allfather silences all voices present.

"Thor Odinson, my heir-," Allfather begins. At the mention of Thor being his heir I feel Loki change his weight from one foot to the other. I reach back slightly and take hold of a portion of his cloak and tug gently. Loki cannot bear the thought that Allfather chose Thor over him as the heir, but this was not the time nor place for him to be expressing his displeasure. When Loki changes his weight from one position to another, he feels compelled to move, to pace, to rid himself somehow of his agitation. Loki is a man of many masks, but every now and then he'll let his emotions get the best of him. Perhaps my tug reminds him of the timing, perhaps it does not. Regardless, Loki looks down to the floor and regains the composure no one else realizes he had lost.

"-my first born, so long entrusted with the mighty hammer, Mjolnir, forged in the heart of a dying star…" Allfather continues on with his speech, as is customary for such passings of power. He asks whether he swears to abide by the Oath of the King, to act as a loving and understanding King, to be selfless for their happiness and protection. Thor, without hesitation, swears. However, just as Allfather is about to proclaim Thor the new King, he stops, and looks away, as if some unheard alarm had just resounded.

"Frost Giants," he mutters, but no one can react quickly enough before he lifts his staff and allows it to fall back down to the ground with a loud ring. Everyone's eyes are on Allfather as the ring fades. He sighs.

"My sons," he calls, before he turns and walks away with Loki and Thor not far behind. The people begin to talk amongst themselves. As the Queen attempts to silence and console them, Volstagg, Hogun, and Fandral make their way over me and Sif.

"Did he say Frost Giants?" Volstagg questions.

"Yes, he did," Sif confirms.

"Thor isn't going to take very kindly to that," he responds smiling slightly. It was true. The ceremony was incomplete, and Thor will now have to wait another day to become king. Depending on the cause of this unexpected delay, the wait may be indefinite. We left the hall to wait for the princes' return, no doubt with unhappy news. By the time we were able to find the brothers, they were sitting in the dining hall with the table overturned and food littering the floor. Loki and Thor are sitting on the steps, the former looking at us over his shoulder.

I sigh and gesture to all the wasted food. "I planned on eating that, you know. Forget your coronation; the feast is what I was more excited to attend. My day, totally ruined." A smile crept its way onto Loki's face for a moment, before he faces his brother again.

"If it's any consolation, I think you're right. About the Frost Giants, about Laufey, about everything. If they found a way to penetrate Asgard's defenses once who's to say they won't try again? Next time with an army," Loki tells him. I stand next to Sif, listening. For a moment, I turn my attention to Volstagg, who offers me a plate of bread and cheese he is holding. I smile and wave it off, telling him that I was just teasing. He is such a sweet friend. I am brought back to attention when Loki starts saying "No! No, no, no, no! I know that look!"

"It's the only way to ensure the safety of our borders!"

"Thor, it's madness," Loki states. At the word 'madness' Volstagg lifts his head and turns to Loki.

"Madness? What sort of madness?"

"We're going to Jotunheim," Thor says.

"What? This isn't like a journey to earth where you summon a little lightning and thunder and the mortals worship you as a god," Fandral claims, finding the idea ludicrous. He is watching Thor intently. If he is trying to place any reason into Thor's mind it certainly isn't working. Thor is far too stubborn for that. Once he has a plan in his mind, he will stick to it no matter how hard one may try and kick him back onto the right path. "This is _Jotunheim_."

"My father fought his way into Jotunheim, defeated their armies and took their casket. We would just be looking for answers," Thor responds. Loki shakes his head before holding it in his hand. Sif steps forward, unafraid to confront Thor. "It is forbidden!"

Thor simply laughs. I sigh and throw my hands up. He never takes anything seriously. He thinks this is good for his people, and his intentions are good, but the whole idea practically screamed 'suicide!'

"My friends, have you forgotten all that we have done together?" Thor asks, walking towards us. "Fandral. Hogun. Who led you into the most glorious of battles?"

"You did," Hogun answered.

"And, Volstagg," Thor continues turning to the redhead. "To delicacies so succulent you thought you'd died and gone to Valhalla?" Thor puts his arms around Volstagg, who has been happily arranging what food he can in front of him. Volstagg chuckles and provides the same answer as Hogun.

"Yes!" Thor exclaims, laughing. He turns to Sif. "And who proved that a young maiden could be one of fiercest warriors this realm has ever known?" Sif smiles and claims that would have been her doing. As he continues on with his speech, I sit next to Loki.

"It seems like we've been excluded from this warrior group, don't you think, love?" I ask, resting my chin on my palm. Loki chuckles and continues to watch Thor as he excites our friends over the prospects of success. "They just can't handle the fact that we fight as a unit instead of individuals."

"When you actually fight, you mean," he remarks turning toward me slightly with a grin. I shove him on the shoulder.

"I am a strong, _defensive_ fighter. I don't actually fight unless I have to. I heal. I'm much better that that than I am at throwing punches. I don't exactly hear you complaining when I'm watching your back," I retort. He smiles and reaches down to gather my hand in both of his. He raises my fingers to his lips and kisses them.

"And what satisfaction it must bring you to know you are the only one to be able to do so," he says with a smirk, placing my fingers against his cheek. If I am honest with myself, it actually brings me more happiness than anything else that he trusts me and me alone, with his back. For as much as I love him, Loki is not a trusting man. He suspects everyone of hating him, and he hates and despises in return. I know many who see Loki as sly, cunning, and mischievous. They are right to believe so. I have to protect him from these people. I have to make sure Loki does not fall completely into darkness. But how much can I protect him from when he has been exposed to so much of it already?

Thor excitedly backs away to see all of us together. Loki lowers my hand to his lap, but does not let go. "My friends…we're going to Jotunheim."

Within minutes of his decision, Thor is pushing us all out the door urging us to don our armor. While I am not the most physically strong fighter, I carry the most armor right after Thor. My armor is made of titanium plates that protect all points of my arm (with the exception of my hands), shoulders, legs, and chest. Due to my fighting style, my armor must be strong, but cannot hinder my movements. I do not know how to wield a sword, or any other weapon other than perhaps a small knife. Loki is the one to deal the damage. I take the blow and he strikes. Should I find myself in a situation where Loki or anyone else is not there to strike for me, I have been taught throwing techniques that allow me to either distance myself from the opponent, or short range strikes that render them unconscious if performed correctly. Being a healer, I know all the points that allow me to do so. I have rather good reflexes when it's just me and my armor but put something in my hand and I am doomed to fail. Something Loki never ceases to laugh about.

Together we walk to gather our, their, weapons. Thor, already with Mjolnir in hand, muses out loud. "First, we must find a way to get past Heimdall."

"That will be no easy task!" Volstagg says, looking over to the rest of us. "It's said that the Gate Keeper can see a single drop of dew fall from a blade of grass a _thousand_ worlds away." Fandral rolls his eyes and laughs at the thought.

"Yes, and he can hear a cricket passing gas in Nifelheim." Sif is smiling, finding this all very amusing. Hogun doesn't smile. He never smiles. They don't call him 'The Grimm' without reason, I suppose. He's a very good friend, despite his lack of mirth. Fandral, who never has any lack of it, constantly attempts to get him to smile. He never gets one. Every now and then Sif and I can drag one out of him, much to Fandral's exasperation. I'm positive he does it on purpose.

With all this discussion going on, it won't be any time at all before someone reports it to Allfather. That would just ruin all the fun, now wouldn't it? I roll my eyes at the two once more before turning and walking up to the guards lined up a little ways back. They tilt their eyes down slightly, but say nothing to me.

"I'm sorry to be a bother, but I ask you to not say anything of this? It would be a bit of a disappointment if we were caught before we even get to the gate," I explain to them. The man closest to me smiles briefly.

"You know you have no chance of getting past the gate keeper, Lady Astra," He says. I return the smile. One of the reasons I enjoy using my abilities is you get to meet so many people. I am acquainted with many of the guard since they've all been injured at one point or another. I do not know many of them into any depth, but some of them, such as this man, I know due to their extended stays or some members of their family had been under my care at one point.

"We'll see about that, now won't we, Idasson?" I respond with a wink. "Tell me, how is your sister? No reoccurrences with her last sickness, I hope?"

He would have answered me, but he stops and lifts his eyes to something taller behind me. A hand comes to rest on my waist and another places itself on Idasson's shoulder in brief greeting. I look up and back to see Loki smile at the guard. "Thank you, it is much appreciated, but we must go now." Idasson nods his head.

"My lord," he responds. Loki turns me to the side and continues to walk with his hand on my waist. I can feel my lips twist in several different motions before I manage to simply grin. "You're a little possessive today," I comment idly. Loki clucks and gestures to the group walking ahead of us.

"I thought it would be best if you didn't find yourself left behind," he replies. I laugh. Loki is very possessive. He is graceful in how he will show up if I am in the presence of another man other than Thor or medically under my care, but behind the smile he offers I can very clearly hear him warning the other. He does not like it when others get to close to something that is his. And though I tease him about it, it is something we do argue about from time to time. I am not something he can claim like his multitude of other possessions. Still, I don't always mind the attention.

"You're going to be the one left behind if you don't hurry up!" I say through a laugh and jog forward to catch up with the others who have begun to mount their horses. He soon follows suit. I place myself into my saddle and run my hand over the grey flesh of my horse. Her name is Hadda and she is as beautiful as her name. Her coat is the same shade as ash with eyes as green as the first leaves of spring. We have been together for many years and there isn't a day I don't pay her a visit. She's very calm, but loves to run more than anything else. I am happy to oblige to her wishes when we ride together. She was given to me by Frigga as a gift a few years after the death of my mother. I love her more than I can express.

Without any other reason for delay we all set out to the Bifrost. We are confronted by none and as we draw close to the golden gates I can smell the salt of the water. Above us, the sky fades from gold to that of color webs of color and bright collections of stars. The towering doors open to us and we continue to ride across the bridge until we reach the end, where Heimdall, the guard to the entrance of Asgard stands waiting.

* * *

A/N: This is honestly so fun to write. And I understand that I am just following the main plot of Thor, but I wanted to see how things would turn out if something had been different. And for clarification, I do not see this character as a heroine. I actually see her partially insane and obsessive. While Loki is one extreme, she is the other and I think that is what makes them fit together so well in my mind. These characters are just so much fun to work with. Please, leave any comments or questions you have in a review. And I understand constructive criticism, but honestly, if you tell me I'm just copying the plot and this isn't original, then just keep it to yourself. As I have said, this work on a whole is not original. Thank you!


	2. Chapter 2

Heimdall watches over our world and sees all. He is also responsible for the traveling along the Bifrost to other worlds; in our case, to Jotunheim. He is a being of giant stature with eyes of the deepest amber. On more than one occasion have I come to see him for advice. He is wise beyond any other, and more observant. It is he who taught me to look for the smallest details and to listen to what others were truly saying behind their words. A skill I found useful when growing up with one prone to mischief. His instruction has also helped me in healing others, and for that I am eternally grateful. I admit I do not know much about him, but I do know that not many slip past his watch. He will be looking for reasons as to how the Frost Giants managed to do so.

Some distance away we dismount. I give Hadda a reassuring pat on the shoulder before following the others. Loki lengthens his stride to be ahead of Thor, telling his brother to leave this to him. Loki smiles and bows slightly to Heimdall. He begins to greet him, but Heimdall interrupts him.

"You're not dressed warmly enough," he says.

"I'm sorry?" Loki questions.

"Do you think you can deceive me?" Loki chuckles at the guard's question.

"You must be mistaken!"

"Enough!" Thor interjects. I cannot see his face, but I can see Loki's shoulders tense. Thor steps around him to speak to Heimdall himself. Loki is slowly clenching his fist. I sigh and look down only for a moment, then back to Heimdall. I wish Thor were not so arrogant and impatient. If things are not progressing as quickly as he would like, or to his taste, he takes matters into his own hands. More often than not, this means overtaking his brother in conversation. Loki despises it. Allfather does the same, which is where I'm sure Thor picked up on it. Always shoved to the back, always treated as if he is less than equal to them. He loves them dearly, but he hates them just as much. I feel as if this is where most of his anger originated. He feels they treat him as inferior. As an outsider to the situation, I can truly see how he would gather that. However, it is not that he is inferior. Allfather has a tendency to favor Thor and Thor prides himself on that. I have asked Frigga about it, but her response is never concrete. She always seems to avoid it. I hate to bother her, so I push it aside, thinking she doesn't wish to openly point out the faults in Allfather. I am grateful that she treats both Thor and Loki on equal footing. "Heimdall, may we pass?"

"Never has an enemy slipped my watch until this day," Heimdall replies slowly. His eyes flicker over to me, to Loki, then back to Thor. "I wish to know how that happened." A horrible pang jolts in my stomach. Does he suspect Loki to be behind this? True, Loki is behind most of the trouble in Asgard; whether it is mild or panic inducing. But would he really go so far as to bring in Frost Giants? I stare at Loki from behind. For an instant, I tell myself, _No. Loki would never go that far! He couldn't!_ But even I, for all the naivety I still possess, know that in truth Loki can go much further than that. I just hope he hasn't.

"Then tell no one where we have gone until we've returned. Understand? " It was more of a demand than a question. Thor doesn't wait for another response either way, and passes Heimdall into the spherical chamber that would allow us to travel to Jotunheim. We all follow suit except for Loki, who remains standing in front of Heimdall. Volstagg slows in front of me to make a comment to Loki.

"What happened? Silver tongue turned to lead?" I frown and raise my foot up high enough to make contact with the lower part of Volstagg's back. He stumbles forward when I push him roughly. Fandral laughs and Volstagg, once he regains his balance, joins in.

We all gather at the back of the chamber and wait as Heimdall places his sword into the platform located in the center of the room. Once in position, bright tendrils of light appear forming an image of Yggdrasill, the tree of worlds. Beneath us, the mechanism begins to spin. Soon after the walls begin to spin as well and before us opens a blue and white tunnel of energy. It really is beautiful.

"Be warned," Heimdall calls behind us. "I will honor my sworn oath to protect this realm as its Gatekeeper. If you return threatens the safety of Asgard, Bifrost will remain closed to you and you'll be left to die in the cold waste of Jotunheim."

"Couldn't you just leave the bridge open for us?" Volstagg asks.

"To leave the bridge open would unleash the full power of the Bifrost and destroy Jotunheim with you upon it," explains the Gatekeeper. Loki glances over in my direction, his lips in a firm line. He's calculating something, but I can't decipher what it is.

Thor laughs, "I have no plans to die today."

"None do," Is the last thing I hear before we are dragged into the tunnel and flung across many worlds to Jotunheim. When we come out of the swirl of color and land on the solid ground of the distant world, I realize the drop in temperature immediately. The air is freezing, causing our breaths to appear and hair to stand on end. However, the latter part can be because of the darkness of our surroundings. Everything around us is covered in a thick layer of ice. The shadows race silently under the edges making it seem as if they were hundreds of eyes watching us. I don't like it here. Not at all.

We are standing on the edge of a great precipice and I cannot see the bottom. Fandral and I look at one another before looking back forward to the giant structures of a fallen world. There is a deafening stillness here and I cannot escape the fear growing within me. I slowly step forward towards Loki until I can reach out and take hold of his cloak.

"We shouldn't be here," Hogun says. Loki's head moves to the left slightly in a way that lets me know he glanced at Thor to read a reaction. His hand reaches back blindly along the edges of his cloak until he finds my hand and grasps it firmly.

"Let's move," Thor commands and takes the first steps forward. Loki glances back at me again then drops my hand to follow his brother. He doesn't want me to be far behind, I can tell that much from his look. While I don't sense any heightened fear from him, he doesn't trust whatever might be lurking in the darkness. Around us buildings and rock crumble from the cold, filling the silence occasionally with echoing '_booms.'_

"Where are they?" Sif asks as we walk.

"Hiding," Thor replies "As cowards always do." We walk a long while and eventually come to a small circular courtyard, or what remains of one. As we step closer, a voice rings out through the cold.

"You've come a long way to die, Asgardians." We come to a stop, but Thor takes a couple more forward.

"I am Thor Odinson!"

"We know who you are," the voice answers. I glance out of either side of my vision. I can see no others. The voice is coming from ahead of us, among the rubble of the higher edges of the courtyard.

"How did your people get into Asgard?" Thor demands. I finally spot him several meters above us. His red eyes stick out against his blue skin. He is sitting against a piece of broken structure, eyes fixed on Thor's figure. Somehow, now that I see him, I am not so afraid. He is something tangible that I can see and defend against. I know it is a fault of mine to be so easily frightened of something I do not know exists. My mind races and picks up on the worst possible outcomes, driving me into a panic. But once I see or hear that something is there, well, then I know it isn't just the darkness inside me.

The Frost Giant smiles. "The House of Odin is full of traitors." Thor steps forward, hackles on end.

"Do not dishonor my father's name with your lies!" he bellows.

"Your father is a murderer and a thief!" the Frost Giant spits back as he stands. My arms turn reflexively so that the metal plates are forward and ready to defend. I do not trust this Frost Giant to not attack, or not to have others waiting to do so.

"And why have you come here? To make peace?" he continues "You long for battle. You crave it. You're nothing but a boy trying to prove himself a man." I can hear footsteps now. I turn to the side and see dozens of Frost Giants appearing around us. They begin to close in and I realize that we have fallen into a trap. The courtyard extends too high for us to get over quickly and the Frost Giants have come up behind us to push us against the wall. I am a fool for not realizing it sooner. Sif and the others notice as well and look around nervously.

"Well, this 'boy' has grown tired of your mockery," Thor tells the Frost Giant above. The blue man clenches his fist and lowers it to his side. His arm, along with the arms of the Frost Giants surrounding us, begins to ice over into jagged weapons.

"Thor, stop and think," Loki advises, stepping close to his brother. "Look around you, we're outnumbered."

"Know you place, brother," Thor hisses. I almost screech at Thor. Who is he to make such a statement? He is being incredibly foolish right now! We are, as far as I can tell, outnumbered at least ten to one, and I have never fought a Frost Giant so I don't know how well we'll fair against just one! Our lives and the peace of Asgard are not worth Thor's pride! I am overcome with an extreme desire to knock him unconscious and call for Heimdall to return us home.

"You know not what your actions would unleash," the Frost Giant warns. He stops and looks down, a sudden remorse creeping into his eyes. "I do." I realize that he, though he has us surrounded and completely on edge, is thinking about the consequences. I wonder, is he the king of Jotunheim? Is he, unlike Thor, thinking about what this break in peace could do to his people?

"Go now, while I still allow it," he sighs eventually. Out of the shadows before Loki and Thor a Frost Giant steps forward in a threatening manner. This close up, I see how large they truly are. Both Thor and Loki to me are tall, but this Frost Giant towers over both of them. I don't like how close he's getting to Loki and Thor. I don't like it. But any motion I make now can be read as hostile. I can't move yet. I can't grab them.

"We will accept your most gracious offer," Loki answers when Thor does not. Thor looks at his brother, then back to the Frost Giant. Thor is furious. I can see him shaking. He wants to smash his hammer into the face of the Frost Giant. Loki turns with his hand in the crook of Thor's elbow trying to get Thor to turn away with him. "Come on, brother."

I can see Loki's face as he walks in my direction. He is staring straight into me. I am confused. Loki is as calm as I have ever seen him. Behind him, I can see the outline of Thor turning to follow. Why is Loki so calm?

"Run back home, little princess."

I close my eyes and my heart drops. I hear Loki breathe. "Damn." Here it comes. I take a deep breath, then release.

I open my eyes and throw myself next to Loki. My arms raise themselves above my head as a Frost Giants slams his ice covered arm towards my head and Loki's shoulder. Over my arms a dagger lodges itself into the Frost Giant's face. He falls. I can hear Fandral laughing. Loki turns and conjures a blade to hurl at an oncoming Frost Giant. Another slashes down at my body. I slide to the left and thrust two of my knuckles into the flesh right above the elbow of the giant. He is thrown off balance. The lower back. Behind the knee. He falls and I do not wait for him to get back up.

I can hear the others. Thor is laughing. He's having fun. Lucky him. I look up. Loki is standing on the edge of a cliff right beside me. Before us a Giant lets out a cry and charges. Loki touches my arm, then reaches around to my other hand and pulls me behind a pillar. The Frost Giant does not see us move, but sees an image copy of us standing there instead. The Frost Giant falls off the cliff before he realizes that he ran through what should have been our bodies. Loki's ability to hide his movements and replace himself with an illusion copy is without a doubt the greatest asset to our fighting.

There is running behind us. I turn to my right and grab the hand that reaches for my hair. One hand on the wrist, other on the elbow. Keep the arm straight and twist my body down, damage to the rotator cuff. Loki thrusts a dagger into the Frost Giant's neck. I gasp in surprise when the leather gloves cover my hands begin to deteriorate. My hands, now exposed to the cold, begin to grow numb.

Volstagg cries out behind me. "Don't let them touch you!" I look around, trying to find him. Is he hurt? Where is Volstagg? A Frost Giant slams down in front of me. It reaches down to grab my head. Its hand it huge, it'll crush me with ease. I can't move. Loki steps behind me and thrusts his dagger in between the Frost Giant's ribs. His teeth are gritted in anger, and he growls as he shoves the dagger in deeper with the heel of his palm. It cries out, but doesn't fall. Instead of reaching for me it now takes a hold of Loki's left arm. The armor shatters from the cold and the fabric dissolves instantly. Panic seizes me when I see this monster touching the bare flesh of his arm. My strikes were quick and it still only took moments for the leather to dissolve. This would completely destroy his arm! I screech his name, but the cold air seizes my lungs and it only comes out above a whisper.

But Loki doesn't cry out. We both watch as his arm begins to turn blue and develop ridges, matching those on the arm of the Frost Giant holding him. For an instant, everything is silent. Why isn't Loki in pain? Why does his arm resemble a Frost Giant's? So many questions flood my mind, I cannot think straight. The Frost Giant slowly looks from Loki to me. They were the same. _Shit! _I have to act. They can't see this. No one else can see this!

_Fuck. _I slam my heel into the back of the Giant's knee causing him to fall to the ground. Loki takes advantage of the moment and drives another conjured dagger into the Giant's chest. It crumples to the ground. I stand close to Loki covering his arm from view. We watch as the blue ebbs away and his arm returns to normal. Loki jerks his head in my direction. His breathing is ragged and his eyes keep moving from one spot on my face to another.

Once, when Thor, Loki and I were still very young, Allfather brought us into the holding place of The Casket that was stolen from the Frost Giants. Allfather had told us about how the Frost giants attacked Midgard and how he drove them back here into Jotunheim. They were defeated on their homeland and peace was brought to all the realms once more. Loki had asked if there were still any Frost Giants left. I had been wondering the same thing. To me as a child back then, Frost Giants were terrifying. I never wanted to see one. Funny how things end up. Thor had turned to us and said _"When I'm king, I'll hunt down the Frost Giants and kill them all!"_ Loki looks into my eyes and we both know we remembered the same memory.

Fandral screams behind me. I turn to see spears of ice sticking out of the ground and one covered in blood protruding from his shoulder. Loki throws a dagger into the body of the Frost Giant responsible as I run over to Fandral.

"Hogun! Volstagg!" I yell. They weren't far behind and were soon by my side pulling Fandral off the ice. I take hold of Fandral's face and force him to look at me.

"Hang in there, Fandral. Stay awake!" I tell him, placing my hand on the open wound. I close my eyes and try to conjure up what spell I can.

"Thor!" Sif yells. Thor doesn't reply. He is too caught up in the battle.

Loki turns to his brother. "We must go!"

"Then go!" is his reply.

Warm spreads through my arms and from my palm flows a golden light. The light breaks off into tiny strings that attach themselves to the wounded flesh. The ground shakes and my eyes open. My concentration is ebbing away with the spell. Beside us, a giant monster awakens from the ice. I grit my teeth and haul him onto Volstagg's back. "I can't heal him here! We have to go!" Hogun nods and we begin to run as quickly as we can. Volstagg screams for us to run. I don't know if Thor hears him. I look back, searching for Loki. He isn't far behind me. Sif grabs my arm and we begin to run. Loki calls for Thor one last time.

We haven't run far when I see Fandral look up and curse. I glance over my shoulder. Oh, wonderful. Just what we needed! A giant Frost Giant dog creature is now following us. While most of us cannot fly like Thor manages, we do have enhanced speed when compared to mortals. An enhancement I am grateful for at this moment. The creature swings its tail down upon us. Sif and Loki barely manage to avoid being impaled. A massive bolt of lightning strikes the ground back where we left Thor. There is a tremendous crack and the ground begins to crack and split open. Much to Fandral's amusement, our giant pursuer falls within the expanding crack. At least he can laugh. Hopefully, this means his lungs haven't been punctured.

The ground is still breaking though and we're running out of ground to cover. Before long, we hit the edge of the cliff. "Heimdall, open the bridge!" There is no reply, nor does the bridge appear. I curse. Heimdall will not open it for us, such was his warning. _Damn it._

I cry out as a giant claw comes within inches of my face. Loki snatches the neck of my armor and pulls me back into him. A giant face appears over the cliff following the claw. It's the monster that had been following us moments ago. I throw a look over to Fandral who sighs dramatically and flops back down onto Volstagg. Sif gasps and takes a couple steps back as the creature pulls itself onto the ledge. Loki's hands are on my arms now, pulling me back behind him. I can feel his fingers leaving bruises. The creature roars at us, but as it lifts its head, a flash of red slashes through its mouth to the back of its head. It stumbles for a moment, and then crashes to the ground before us. I look into its mouth a see a gaping hole at the back of its throat. Thor lands on the ground before it moments after. The lifeless body slips off the edge of cliff into the darkness below.

Hearing footsteps behind us, I turn out of Loki's grasp to see any army of Frost Giant's before me. Everyone else turns as well, eyes wide. So, is this it? Is this where we are to die? If matters weren't so pressing I might have been obligated to murder Thor on the spot. His arrogance and pride got us into this. We back up slowly, knowing we only have a few feet before the edge of the cliff. I hold my arms ready and glance back to make sure Loki is behind me.

Just as the Frost Giants charge at us light glitters the ground beneath us, then fills our vision. Heimdall has opened the bridge. When I turn to look I see Allfather with his staff raised as he sits upon the back of Sleipnir. Relief floods every poor of my being. Allfather is _here._ I sigh and smile. We may live through this yet. I look up to read Loki's reaction. I frown. He isn't smiling. In fact, he looks calm again.

"Father! We'll finish them together!" Thor cries.

"Silence!" Allfather hisses. Loki raises his chin slightly. I have not heard Allfather silence Thor in a very long time. I am sure that Loki is enjoying the fact that Thor is in tremendous trouble. The Frost Giant we first encountered elevates himself with a column of ice, bringing himself to the height of Allfather.

"Allfather," he greets. "You look weary."

"Laufey, end this now," Allfather demands. Ah, so he is the king.

"Your boy sought this out," Laufey accuses. We all look to Thor.

"You're right. And these are the actions of a boy, treat them as such," Allfather responds. "You and I can end this here and now, before there's further bloodshed." Allfather is breathing heavily. I wonder how much it took from him to travel here to us so quickly.

"We are beyond diplomacy now, Allfather. He'll get what he came for. War and death."

I look to Allfather once more. I have never seen him look so old before. "So be it." Laufey raises his hand to strike, and it isn't until he brings it down that I notice he has a small dagger of ice in his hand. I take a step forward. Allfather! Loki holds my arm tightly, keeping me from going any further. Before Laufey can strike him, Allfather lifts up his staff, and we are lifted back across the Bifrost and into Asgard.

A/N: While I enjoyed making these first two chapters, the following chapters will be more of what I'm focusing on. It really lets me play with their relationship and set the character up! Let me know what you guys think! Leave a review or follow me on tumblr! Same name.


	3. Chapter 3

Once my feet touch solid ground I turn and run to Fandral as he is being taken off of Volstagg's back. He groans. I place my hands over his wound focusing once again on the uplifted flesh. "Oh, shush, shush, shush! You're all right, Fandral." Thor brushes past me, demanding to know why Allfather has brought us back. I am vaguely aware of Allfather's response, but I cannot spare the focus to put sense into the words. Warmth spreads through my hands more quickly than it did back on Jotunheim and then golden threads begin to stem the flow of blood soaking into Fandral's tunic.

"Astra!" I turn to see Allfather throwing his arm out in anger towards Sif, Hogun, Volstagg and me. "Get him to the healing room! Now!" I hoist Fandral's arms onto Volstagg and Hogun's shoulders.

"I stemmed the blood for now, but he still needs my attention. Get him on Hadda, she's faster than any of yours!" I command, leading them towards the door.

"No, Astra," Allfather calls. I stop and face him as the others continue to bring Fandral to the horses. "He will be taken care of under one of your students. You stay." I start to object, but Allfather silences me with a quick step forward. Heimdall takes my place in escorting the others out of the chamber.

"There won't be a kingdom to protect if you're afraid to act," Thor says to his father. I walk around the central platform to stand beside Loki. His eyes are fixed on Allfather. "The Jotuns must learn to fear me, just as they once feared you." Loki sighs and allows his eyes to skim the floor.

"That's pride and vanity talking, not leadership. You've forgotten everything I taught you about a warrior's patience."

"While you wait and be patient the Nine Realms laugh at us. The old ways are done. You stand giving speeches while Asgard falls," Thor accuses.

"You are a vain, greedy, cruel boy!" Allfather roars. I close my eyes for a moment. I hate it when Allfather yells like that. I do not fear him as others might think. I just find it hard to bear then shame that Thor doesn't have. He has once again insulted his father because he cannot see through the thick cloud of his own pride.

"And you are an old man and a fool!" Thor roars back.

"Thor!" I yell in anger. He is overstepping his bounds. I try to step towards him, but Loki grabs my wrist tightly. Thor is not king of Asgard and should remember that his father still remains on the throne! He almost had us all killed and yet he cannot see that. All he cares about is his stupid ideals. And what are they, exactly? "Regain" the glory that Asgard has never lost and start a war that could bring Asgard to ruin? Oh yes, these are the actions of a man, no, _boy_ "ready" to lead.

Allfather falls silent and slowly looks to the ground. "Yes." My anger slowly transforms into sadness. The lines in his face seem deeper than usual and he seems tired. Laufey was right. He does look weary. Allfather has tried to raise Thor to be wise and just. He has tried to show him that reason and patience are what create a great leader. But, it appears his teachings have all been for naught. I sigh and step back. "I was a fool to think you were ready."

"Father…" Loki pleads stepping forward. Allfather points at Loki savagely and lets out an incomprehensible yell. Loki straightens up quickly and stops short in his steps.

"Allfather!" I yell as my anger flares within me again. His quarrel is with Thor, not with Loki. "Do not misplace you anger!" Loki takes a couple steps away from Allfather. I back up to stand in front of him. I will not have Allfather blame Loki because of Thor's misgivings. Allfather redirects his eyes to mine. His lips are in a firm line and I know he can feel my anger. He sighs, shoulders drooping, and looks away.

"Thor Odinson," Allfather utters. He lifts his head. His eyes are hard and full of pain. "You have betrayed the express command of your king. Through your arrogance and stupidity, you've opened these peaceful realms and innocent lives to the horror and desolation of war!" Allfather lifts his staff and thrusts down into the platform. Yggdrasill bursts to life, branches of light whipping around the chamber. I gasp and take another step back. I feel my back press into Loki's chest. Allfather and Thor are right in front of us. What's going on? What is Allfather _doing_? "You are unworthy of these realms!" Allfather reaches out and begins to rip off pieces of Thor's armor. "You're unworthy of your title!" Thor cloak is ripped from his shoulders. I watch as it crumples to the floor. My hands are covering my mouth. When did they get there?

"You're unworthy," Allfather bellows, then pauses. His voice is softer when he speaks again. "You're unworthy of the loved ones you have betrayed." I can feel Loki's head turn to look at Thor. Allfather watches Thor. They wander from place to place on his son's face, almost trying to memorize each feature. After a moment, he cannot bear it any longer and looks away. Allfather walks back to the platform and raises his hand.

"I now take from you your power!" Mjolnir rips out of Thor's hand and flies into Allfather's. "In the name of my father and his father before," Thor's armor begins to shatter, the metal pieces creating soft _'chink's_ on the floor. "I, Odin Allfather, cast you out!" I take a couple steps forward reaching out to grab Thor, but Loki roughly grabs hold around my waist and pulls me back. Thor deserves punishment, but to be banished? Left alone in the mortal world without a friend? Without his power to defend himself? A bolt of lightning springs out of Mjolnir and strikes Thor in the chest. What remains of his armor explodes off of him and clatters to the floor and Thor is thrown back into the swirling colors of the Bifrost.

"Thor!" I cry, struggling against Loki. Behind me, Loki lets out a small cry. I slam my knuckles into Loki's elbow and he releases me. I turn to face him as tears well in my eyes. I am angry. Upset. Mortified. Distraught. But as I look into Loki's eyes I see the same emotions, as well as fear. My angers drains and fear replaces me, causing a chill to spread as far as my fingertips. Allfather throws Mjolnir into the Bifrost after Thor. Loki lifts his head to watch.

Allfather just banished Thor. What will he do to Loki? Loki has some connection to the Frost Giants. I don't know how yet, but Allfather might send Loki away, too! No! I reach down and grab Loki's hand and pull him away from Allfather. As we walk quickly to the door, I hear Allfather call out my name. I ignore him and push Loki ahead of me. I have to get him away from Allfather. I have to protect him. I won't let Allfather take him away! Allfather calls me again and I glance over my shoulder. Allfather is leaning against his staff breathing heavily. I should help him. I know that's why he had me stay, but I cannot stop. I cannot bring myself to turn back.

We reach the horses and Loki climbs onto his. I go to climb onto Fandral's, but Loki wrenches around in his saddle with a fierce "No!" I face him quickly in surprise. His eyes are hard and still filled with emotion. They focus on me as a whole, but they skit from one part of my face to another. "You will ride with me!" He reaches his hand down. I reach up in return. As soon as he pulls me up in front of him, we race down the bridge and away from Allfather.

Both Loki and I have calmed down somewhat by the time we find Sif, Hogun, and Volstagg within the palace. Loki tries to keep me by his side, going so far to try and hold me there, but I gently place my hands on his and remind him that I am a healer. One of my friends still has an injury. He breathes a little harshly in impatience, but allows me to slip away from him nonetheless. Hogun is pacing as I kneel down next to Volstagg. I gently lift his arm to inspect the damage. His arm has what looks like severe frostbite in the shape of a giant hand.

"We never should have let him go," Volstagg claims. I sigh and hover my hand over his arm, allowing for the spell to begin. Volstagg winces slightly and takes a swig of his wine, but make no other signs of discomfort.

"There was no stopping him," Sif comforts.

"Well, at least he's only banished, not dead," Hogun throws out, still pacing. I watch my friend's uneasy movements around the fire pit in the center of the room. He's right. At least Allfather hadn't executed him. Not that Allfather could. He loves Thor far too much for that. I regret to admit that banishment was the better of the two options.

"Which is what we'd all be if that guard hadn't told Odin where we'd gone," Fandral remarks. He must be speaking about Idasson. I did not think he heard where we were going exactly. I did not tell him and I did not hear Loki mention it. However…I look over at Loki briefly. He had hesitated before catching up with us at the horses. Had he used one of his doubles to tell the guard? Volstagg jerks slightly as I push my spell deeper into his arm, attempting to restore the damaged blood vessels. I can feel my eyes contract and a dull throbbing begins to pulse in my temples. Loki turns to his side along the wall. He isn't facing anyone. He is looking down to the ground and swallows once. He turns his hand over again, trying to find any traces of what we had seen on Jotunheim.

"How did the guard even know?" Volstagg asks as I turn his arm over.

"I did," Loki says sternly as he looks straight at Volstagg. The red-head stares blankly at him before looking at me in disbelief. I shake my head at him as Fandral questions him in the background. So, he did create a double. I suppose it turned out to be better that he did. Had he not we would most likely be skewered by now, and that's putting things nicely. Volstagg jumps forward slightly in his seat, crying "_You_ told the guard?" I push him roughly back into the chair and continue on with my work with a faster pace. Within seconds his arm was at least to the point where it could heal on its own. I try to straighten up, but the room begins to dance and I have to stand still holding the back of the chair. While I am proud to admit my healing is among some of the best, it does not come without its limits. If I try to do too much in too little time my body pays the price. Pushing too hard can render me unconscious, or in the worst case, place me into a coma.

"I saved our lives. And Thor's. I had no idea that Father would banish him for what he did," Loki reasoned.

"Loki. You must go to the Allfather and convince him to change his mind," Sif pleads. I slowly open my eyes and watch as she breathes heavily. Her shoulders are tense and the muscles in her hands are straining. Would I be so calm if the same had been done to Loki?

"And if I do, then what? I love Thor more dearly than any of you, but you know what he is. He's arrogant. He's reckless. He's dangerous. You saw what he did today. Is that what Asgard needs from its king?" Loki demands. He doesn't wait for an answer and storms out of the room.

"He may speak of the good of Asgard, but he's always been jealous of Thor," Sif spits as she turns away from the door. I purse my lips and look away. She's angry and upset, but what right does that give her to place the blame on Loki when she doesn't know the facts? Volstagg speaks up for Loki, claiming he saved our lives. I place a hand on his shoulder in silent thanks. I can't always take Loki's side, especially when words such as these are being flung about. I am grateful that Volstagg at least has reason.

"Laufey said there were traitors in the House of Odin," Hogun says, turning to look at us. "A master of magic could bring three Jotuns into Asgard." Volstagg glances up at me and places his hand on top of mine. It isn't until I feel his hand that I realize that I had been clutching his shoulder tightly in anger. I release his shoulder and leave the room without bothering to look at the others as I went. It's ridiculous, stupid, and ungrateful for Sif and Hogun to even be thinking such things of Loki. And at the same time, it's really not. Loki really would do those things. Sif is right, Loki is jealous. He hates that Thor gets treated differently. He hates that Thor gets all the attention, all the love. He hates that Thor will gain the throne and he never had the possibility. Thor was bred for the throne, and Loki was thrown into the background. He hates and loves his brother. He wasn't lying when he told Sif he loves Thor more dearly than any of us. He has only ever wanted to be his equal.

In the midst of my reverie, a hand takes hold of my shoulder. I stop walking and instinctively try to move away, but Allfather has a firm grip. I let out a puff of breath and try to slow down my now escalated heartbeat. "Allfather."

"Astra, I need you to come with me." It was a firm command, one in which he doesn't even wait for an answer. I had begun to incline my head, but I give up about halfway when he turns and strides down the hall. I almost have to jog to keep up. After some time, we reach the underground chambers which hold the relics of Asgard. Outside the doors Allfather turns to me.

"Astra, I will need you after this. You are to stay here. If I summon you, only then should you step through these doors. Otherwise, you are to stay here. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, Allfather. But if I may ask, what is going on? Why are we here?"

"I am not ignorant to what happened in Jotunheim, Astra." My heart begins to beat painfully in my chest. He knows? How did he find out? Was it Heimdall? This is impossible! Allfather sighs and reaches down to take my hand. He carefully unclenches it. I didn't realize that I had it that way to begin with. "Loki is my son, child. All will be explained. But we both know Loki, and his temper. He will not be pleased with what I have to say. Loki will not harm me. However…" He takes my other hand. "I am tired, Astra. No one calms him better than you. Do not let me down." Allfather leans forward and places a kiss on my forehead. Then, he pulls away, drops my hands and steps into the chamber.

"Stop!" I hear Allfather cry. I step closer to the door. It was ajar just enough for me to see Loki and Allfather.

"Am I cursed?" Loki asks, still holding the casket, yet refusing to turn around.

"No," answers Allfather.

Loki is silent for a moment then places the casket back on the altar. "What am I?"

"You're my son."

Loki slowly turns and I can see his skin has changed to the same color as in Jotunheim. I can't tell how quickly the color recedes because of the distance, between us, but soon his skin is back to its usual shade. "What more than that?" he questions. He starts walking towards Allfather, never taking his eyes off of him. "The casket wasn't the only thing you took from Jotunheim that day, was it?" As he gets closer I can see his eyes shining from restrained tears. Tears of anguish? Confusion? So many things at once, I suppose. He comes to a stop at the bottom of the steps before Allfather.

"No." Allfather finally replied. I gasp and clap my hands over my mouth. They're shaking. "In the aftermath of the battle, I went into the temple and I found a baby. Small for a giant's offspring. Abandoned, suffering, left to die. Laufey's son."

"Laufey's son." Loki repeated and I can vaguely hear myself do the same.

"Yes."

Loki was trying to bring forth words, but he couldn't. He shakes his head and glances off to the side briefly. I can see his eyebrows furrowing, and lines begin to show on his face. Some people I have known have many lines on their face, from happy times and laughter, from smiling too much. I often associate them with kindness. But these lines were like those of men who return from war. War that had instilled a grief inside them, an anger, despair. But, Loki's war was not one fought on a battleground far from home. "Why? You were knee deep in Jotun blood. Why would you take me?"

"You were an innocent child."

"No. You took me for a purpose. What was it?" Loki demands walking up the steps towards Allfather. But, Allfather did not answer. "TELL ME!" Loki's scream bounces off the walls. I can feel the tears streaming down my face. Loki. His face is so distorted with rage, sweat and unshed tears, but within a second that all drops away to fear and uncertainty. Never before have I seen Loki so distraught, so terrified. What memories and fears are rushing through him right now? _I'm sorry, love._ He doubts everyone now. _I'm so sorry. _

"I thought we could unite our kingdoms one day. Bring about an alliance. Bring about Permanent peace," Allfather explains. "Through you."

"What?"

"But those plans no longer matter." But what now, Allfather? Now that Thor has gone and shattered all hope for peace, what does he plan to do with Loki now that he knows? So many things run through my mind. Terrible things that I know will not truly come to pass. Despite his favoring of Thor, he does love Loki. Frigga loves Loki. Thor loves Loki.

"So I am no more than another stolen relic, locked up here until you might have some use of me." Loki states, panting between words.

"Why do you twist my words?"

"You could have told me what I was from the beginning. Why didn't you?!"

"You're my son. I only wanted to protect you from the truth."

He's stammering. "What, because I am the monster parents tell their children about at night?" No, he's not a monster. _Don't think that, love, please?_

"Don't." Allfather begins to stoop. I gasp and place my hands against the door.

"You know, it all makes sense now! Why you favored Thor all of these years!" Allfather has lowered himself to the stairs now. I push open the doors and run down the stairs, dropping down next to Allfather. Loki doesn't seem to notice me. "Because no matter how much you claim to love me, you could never have a frost giant on the throne of Asgard!" Allfather is gasping and reaching out to Loki. I place my hands on Allfather's chest. I try to feel what is hurting, what is causing him to collapse. But all I feel is an overwhelming stream of emotion that makes the room spin. I remove my hands to grab my head. Once the room steadies, I see Loki is gently holding Allfather's hand. He lets go and glances at me. Loki is breathing heavily and isn't quite sure what to do for a moment. His eyes are pleading for something from me. I reach up and cup his cheek with my hand. His own reaches up to hold my tightly. He turns his face into my hand for only the briefest of moments before calling for the guards.

By the time the guards arrive, I am trying to feel through Allfather again. The flow of emotion is no longer there. His vitals are all fine, though lowered. He feels as if he is sleeping. The guards stand around him, not sure of what to do. "I need to you to carry Allfather to the healing room as quick as possible. I will follow behind you," I command. The guards make sounds of acknowledgement and begin to lift the body. As they carry him out, Loki is standing on the steps facing the casket. I walk down the steps until only two separate us. He doesn't turn to face me. I sigh and wrap my arms around his shoulders, burying my face into his neck. "I'm here," I whisper softly. Loki untangles my arms and turns to face me. His face is harder than before, but his eyes are still brimming with uncontrolled emotion. He pulls me to him and holds me so tightly I can hardly breathe.

"I'm still here, love. I'm still here," I tell him. His nails are digging into me through the fabric of my dress. I run my fingers through his hair trying to soothe him. Anger, so much anger. I can feel him shaking from it. But what else can I do now? How else can I help him? I don't know. "I'm still here."

Notes:  
With the whole execution thing, I know it may not seem that Odin would really even consider executing his son. It's just that she's still upset and jumping to the worst conclusions.


	4. Chapter 4

Due to all the excitement of the past few days, what with the failed coronation and Allfather slipping into Odin-sleep, my visits to Sleipnir had to be put on hold. I have no patients requiring my full attention until later in the day, so I thought it best to go see him while I can. Sleipnir resides in a glorified stable. Granted, it is an enormous, well decorated set of quarters, but a stable nonetheless. While Allfather loves Sleipnir, I believe he fears that he may cause trouble like his father if he is not set under certain conditions. I do not understand Allfather's thinking sometimes. Normally, Loki accompanies me on such visits, but he must attend to matters that Allfather cannot. Sleipnir is already awake by the time I arrive.

"Hello, mother."

"Good morning, love. I'm sorry that I didn't come by yesterday. Things have been very hectic, as I'm sure you've heard," I explain, hugging him around the muzzle and stroking his neck. When I pull away, I hold up the large basket I was carrying. "I brought breakfast."

Sleipnir was born long ago when Loki, Thor, and I were just reaching what those in Asgard consider to be adulthood. All of the Nine Realms have been established, Midgard being the most recent. One day, a skilled builder visited and made us an offer. He said he could create protection for Midgard against Frost giants and Mountain giants if they ever tried to attack again. But in exchange, he wished to take Freiya as his wife, as well as the sun and the moon. Allfather and his council accepted his proposition under the condition that he must finish it before winter without the aid of another man. Surely he would not be able to finish such a task in that time, they thought. Since he could receive no aid from man, the builder asked if he could use his horse Svadilfoeri. Allfather and the council were hesitant to agree. Eager to prove himself before Allfather, Loki advised them to allow it. Even with the horse, the builder would not be able to finish, Loki argued. And so the pact was made.

Together the builder and Svadilfoeri worked hard, day in and day out. By the time summer came around, it really did look like they might be able to finish. Allfather and the council grew terrified at the thought of losing the sun and moon. Seeing the strength the horse possessed they blamed Loki for tricking them into allowing its use. It then fell to Loki to find a way to stop the builder from completing his task. Loki became enraged with Allfather and the council. In the end Loki turned himself into a mare and seduced Svadilfoeri away from his work. The stallion was gone away long enough to keep the task from being completed on time. Still in the form of a mare, Loki gives birth to Sleipnir, the greatest of all horses.

While Loki is proud of Sleipnir's greatness, he was endlessly teased by Thor and the others about becoming a mare and giving birth. Loki acted unaffected by such action, but in truth it added to his already deep anger towards Thor and to Allfather for putting him in such a situation. Although Loki loved Sleipnir, he refused to go near the foal. No other would dare go near a child of Loki, in fear of some misery being placed upon them. Everyone who passed made rude comments and remarks about Loki being his mother and about the builder's stallion. I couldn't bear it. Sleipnir was too young; he didn't understand why these things were being said to him. Finally, I declared my charge for him. I would be Sleipnir's mother and caretaker. I'm not sure what changed in him after that, but Loki began to come with me to see his son. He fought back against Thor and the others. No one jested against Sleipnir again.

Now that he is older, Sleipnir knows that I'm not his birth mother, but regards me as such. He had initially called both Loki and I mother, but eventually settled on calling Loki father. Not because he is ashamed of Loki being his birth mother, but rather to keep others from saying anything. He knows his father would terrorize anyone who spoke against us, but Sleipnir has a kind heart, and doesn't wish for harm to come to others by the hands of his father. While we eat I tell him about everything that's been happening. I was only mildly surprised at how easily he brushes off the fact that his father is a Frost giant. It probably has to do with the fact that he changed into a female horse and gave birth. Not much can top that, I suppose. "And I know I've said it a million times, but I really just don't approve of Allfather using you as his war horse. He is your _grandfather_. That is not exactly what I meant when I asked him to look after you."

"I'm not a child, mother," he argues huffing air onto my face. I grin.

"I know, I know. What else can I say? But you enjoy it don't you?"

"Yes. It's the only time I get out of these stables, really," he pouts. "Other than when the three of us go out riding together every now and then."

"Well, how about this: After I'm done with my duties during the day, I'll kidnap your father, we'll come by, and we can go out riding together. If I don't have any patients some days I'll come by earlier and we can stay out later. Although, I don't think we'll be able to until next week."

"Every day? Do you think Allfather would approve?"

"Allfather can fall into a stinking pile of dung, for all I care! You are the greatest horse in all of the Nine Realms, ridden only by your grandfather and no other. You shouldn't have to be locked up in here all the time," I fuss, gesturing around us. I am about to say more when I clap my hands over my mouth in mild panic. "Heimdall is going to kill me. I just know it. He's probably listening to me right now. Shit."

Sleipnir laughs, and after a few moments I do, too. Heimdall won't say anything to Allfather and even if he does, Allfather already knows my opinion. He will just laugh and wave it off. We continue to eat our breakfast and talk of other things. During the conversation, Sleipnir must notice the extra food in the basket as well as the wine because he asks "Are you going to see Hel today, as well?"

"Yes," I confirm, idly running my hands over the edge of the basket. Sleipnir knows of his siblings, but he has not met them. Loki has three other children, all born by the giantess Angerboda. Fenrir is the giant wolf who was tricked by Allfather and the council into being chained up and had a sword placed in his mouth in such a way that if he closes his mouth, he'll die. I go to visit him every now and then, but he's very angry and bitter with anyone who dares approach him. I do feel that he does regard me as slightly better than others on account of that I have been with his father for far longer than any other of his lovers and I see him more than anyone. He's gone from calling me "woman" to Astra now. Not much, but I can't win them all. Jormungand, a sea-serpent, was thrown into the great ocean surrounding Midgard by Allfather. He has grown so much over the years and has been able to wrap himself around Midgard for some time now. He and Thor have fought in the past. I have never met him, and I don't think Loki wants me to for some reason or another.

Loki's final child is Hel. Hel was born half alive and half dead. The left side of her body is as beautiful as her father with long dark hair and deep green eyes. However, the right side of her body is in a constant state of decay. After seeing her, Allfather immediately sent her to Nifelheim to look after those who die of sickness or of old age. Unlike Sleipnir, who I believe Allfather to love, I know for certain that Allfather has no attachment to Hel in the slightest. He took one look at her face and instantly feared what she might become. He judged her before he even knew her. To say Loki was enraged would be an understatement. I was, too. How could he be so cruel to his own kin, to Loki's children? When he cast her out, I can say I legitimately hated Allfather for a period of time. I took to visiting her when I could and after a few visits, I realized that the decay caused her horrible pain. Now when I visit her I heal her body as much as I can to give her just a few days of peace. I have found a method that slows the process and numbs the body so she won't feel it to the full extent.

"Your father is busy taking over Allfather's duties for the day and I have patients to attend to tomorrow, so this was the best time for me to see the two of you," I admit. With that, I stand and grab my basket. Sleipnir walks with me to the door where we talk for a few more minutes.

"Do you think he let the Frost giants in?" he asks. I sigh and place my hand on his nose.

"Yes," I reply with a small smile. "I would be lying if I said otherwise. I know your father better than anyone, love. I'm just grateful that he didn't do worse." He blows some air into my face again. "Oh shush, you! Once all this all settles down the three of us will go out riding together, all right?" I wrap my arms around his neck and hug him tightly. He presses his head against mine in response. I say goodbye one more time before going to find Hadda. Once there we ride out to the Bifrost and Heimdall. He is standing on the bridge ever watchful as usual. I drop down off of Hadda and walk towards him. I try not to make a face as I see the small tugging at the corners of his eyes.

"Hello, Heimdall. I request passage to Nifelheim, please." Heimdall says nothing and turns to walk to the platform. I would much prefer him teasing me out loud than remaining silent. I can almost hear him laughing at me in that all knowing mind of his. As I walk past him to stand before the opening Bifrost, I make a face at him. He lets out a small chuckle and gestures to the massive swirl of color. I smile and nod, then step in.

Now that I have been to Jotunheim, it seems very similar to Nifelheim. They are both quiet and very empty, with massive structures that can barely support themselves. However, Jotunheim was cold due to the ice, an actual concrete substance. The cold of Nifelheim, is very different. There is no happiness here, only death and decay. Nearly every inch of space is occupied by some soul, both new and ancient. When in the presence of their fellow dead, there is constant chatter and grumbling amongst the souls. Once a living thing steps into the domain all goes quiet. They all stop to watch every move you make and some even reach out to touch, as if they could regain some life by feeling yours. The entire ordeal is terrifying. It is not nearly as bad as when I had first begun my visits, but I am still not fully accustomed to the treatment.

I take a deep breath and walk towards the sea of souls, looking straight ahead. They part to make way for me. I walk for a short while until I come to a large set of stairs leading up to a gate. There are many of these gates in Nifelheim and all of them are inhabited by the souls, except for this one. This gate leads to the area where Hel keeps only for herself. It resembles an open courtyard with several cushioned areas and few low tables for her to sit at. Several large vases have been placed along the edge of the courtyard, but the flowers inside are withered, no color remaining. The souls stop at the top of the stairs as if there were a wall preventing them from going any farther. I let out a small sigh of relief and pass through the gate.

Hel is waiting for me at one of the tables. At my approach she stands, but makes no other motion. I smile and open my arms to bring her into a hug. She is wearing a white dress today with a hem that pools at her feet and sleeves that extend far past her finger tips. I hold her as tightly to me as I can without causing her pain. "Hello, love." She stands motionless for a long moment, but then I can feel her lift her arms and wrap them around me gently. "Hello, Astra," I hear in response. I smile and pull away, sitting her back on her seat.

"I like what you did with your hair, it's rather cute," I compliment as I set the basket on the table. Hel's left hand appears from the fabric of her dress to absent-mindedly run it through her hair. Last I saw her it was to her shoulder, but now it was cropped short to her head with a small bang. Her hair begins to recede and disappear the further to the right along her head you go, replaced by bone and flaking bits of flesh. Where her right eye should have been was an empty hole. It was as if someone had draw a crooked line down the middle of her neck and face with one side full and the other withering away.

"Thank you," she answers and looks into the basket to see what I had brought her. "I take it Father will not be joining us today?"

"Unfortunately not." I reach in, pull out the flask of wine, and uncork it for her. She takes it and begins to drink. "Things have been rather hectic the past couple days."

"So, I've heard," she laughs. I begin to explain the past days' events as I pull her arms through the wide neck of her dress. Her torso is now bare, but neither of are bothered by nakedness. I place one hand on her rips cage under her breast and the other on her shoulder. As we talk, gold threads weave in and out of the bone and skin. She finds it rather amusing that Thor's ceremony had been disrupted. Very much like her father, she is. She loves mischief and challenges, anything that might make her burden a little less mundane. I can't blame her. This place is suffocating.

"So are you two ever going to get married? You and Father?" She asks resting her chin in her hand. I let out a small "ha!"

"Would it make any difference? Do you know how long we have been together?" I ask, shaking my head. It honestly wouldn't make the slightest difference. Frigga herself told me that everyone considers me Loki's wife, despite the lack of ceremony.

"Nearly forever, I should think. But are you ever going to make it legitimate?" She asks. I raise an eyebrow and move one of my hands to her elbow.

"Maybe. We've discussed it," I admit with a shrug. "What brought this up?"

"Nothing," she mumbles and takes a swig of the wine. "Just a passing thought."

"Oh?" A slow smile begins to creep across my lips. She frowns and glares at me with a "no." My smile widens into a grin. "You were thinking about Baldr again weren't you?"

"No!" she claims. I laugh and she huffs and looks away. Baldr, the most handsome of the gods, suffered from horrible nightmares foretelling of his death. Taking pity on him, the other gods made everything in all the realms promise to never bring him harm. The one that did not promise was mistletoe. Looking for something to stir up, Loki extracted this information from Frigga and used it to trick Baldr's blind brother Hod. Because Baldr could not be harmed by anything, others had fun throwing things at him. Hod, not knowing it was his brother, threw the mistletoe and Baldr died immediately. Stricken by grief, the gods asked Baldr's other brother Hermod to ride to Nifelheim and return Baldr to the living. Hermod goes with the help of Sleipnir to ask for Hel's pardon. During his time there, Hel had grown fond of Baldr. He never seemed to fear her like the others. When Hermod came asking for Baldr's life, Hel was torn between losing him and allowing him to be free. She finally agrees, but on the condition that everything in the the world of Asgard must weep for Baldr. When we heard this message naturally we all wept. Except for a giantess named Thanks. Because she did not weep, Baldr was to remain with Hel. Everyone assumed the giantess was actually Loki in disguise. They planned to chain Loki until Ragnarok, along with Fenrir, but I soothed their anger, claiming that Loki had wept with me, that I had witnessed his action. Because of the trust the others had in me, they believed my lie. Loki had transformed into the giantess. When I asked why, he claimed it was for Hel's sake. He refused to have his child damned to the darkness with no hope for happiness. I could not argue with his choice, despite how cruel it might have been to others.

"There's nothing wrong with wanting to find someone, even you are entitled to that, regardless of what Allfather says," I remind her.

"Even if Allfather allowed anyone to come here, it's not likely I'd be able to have Baldr take an interest in me."

"Now you listen to me, young lady!" Hel snaps her head back towards me when she hears the sharpness of my tone. "You are kind and beautiful, a great deal more so than your mother. If your father can be with a Frost Giantess and bear three children, I think you are perfectly capable of finding someone who will love you!"

Hel doesn't reply immediately, but when she does it is in a small fit of laughter. "You look so serious! Were you really that jealous of her?" I grumble an inaudible reply and look away, but that only seems to further her mirth. After a moment, her laughter gives way to comfortable silence. It was true. I had been jealous of Angerboda, but that had been Loki's goal. It seems even I am not entirely immune to his schemes.

I finish my work and replace Hel's dress back on her shoulders. "I don't know when I will be able to come back. Perhaps a week or two. The wine in the basket should help with the time in between." Hel nods. As I prepare to go she stands and follows me to the gate. As before, I gave her a gentle embrace, but this time she returned the gesture without much hesitation.

"Thank you, Astra."

* * *

"Loki has been calling for you for some time now," Heimdall announces as I emerge from the Bifrost.

"That's hardly surprising. Has no one told him where I've gone?" I step out of the chamber and prepare Hadda for the return ride.

"No."

"I can't imagine him being too thrilled then," I chuckle. Heimdall doesn't respond. When I reach our quarters, I nearly run into a servant who seems almost desperate to get out of the room. The servant stammers a quick apology and briskly makes his way down the hall. I step through the doors to find Loki laughing to himself by the open balcony.

"Terrorizing the servants again?"

"I have to find something to amuse myself after all that meaningless drivel I had to endure." He turns from the balcony and faces me with a grimace. "Where have you been? I've been calling for you for a long while now."

"I had other matters to attend to. I don't take myself away from my duties at your command," I retort. Loki takes a couple quick steps towards me, grimace still in place, but the frown fades and his pace slows as he sees the empty basket slightly hidden by my dress. He smiles softly and reaches down to take the basket.

"How are the children?"He asks walking away to set the basket on one of the tables.

"As can be expected. They miss you." I walk to stand beside him at the table.

"Now that I am king, I will see to it that they are never exiled again. No child of mine will ever be thrust back into the shadows," he snarls. His knuckles are turning white. I take his hand and unclench his fist. There are nail marks inside his on his palm. At the moment, telling him that he wasn't actually the King, only acting in Allfather's stead until he recovers, would be unwise. I lift his palm to my lips and kiss the collection of angry red marks.

"Now, come on. Explain the mindless drivel they tortured you with," I tease, pulling him towards the couch. Loki pulls me back into him and bends his torso just enough to bury his face into the curve of my neck. A pleasant chill runs down my spine as he makes small bites on my neck. He releases my hands to run his down the front of my hips to my thighs.

"I can imagine better ways of being tortured," he whispers. I turn and run my own hands from his shoulders to his hips. Pressing our hips together, I guide him in the direction of the bed while pulling him into a kiss that doesn't break until we fell onto the cushions.

"Who did you go to see today? Not all four of them, I assume," Loki asks, resting his heard on my breasts, our nakedness covered by the rumpled sheets. I absent-mindedly begin to run my finger tips along his exposed eyebrow, enjoying the weight of his body against mine.

"Sleipnir and Hel. I promised Sleipnir next week that I would steal you away and the three of us would go out riding together. We haven't been out all together in a while. Not to mention he hasn't seen much of you in the past two weeks, not counting when Allfather came to Jotunheim." Loki nuzzles into my skin and begins to place kisses in the valley of my breasts. His trail leads up to my neck, then to my lips. Loki groans and arches his hips into mines as I drag my nails down his chest. "Hel is doing well. She's worrying about whether or not whether she'll find someone to be with because of her appearance." I reach down and take him into my hand, stroking in accordance with the groans he muffles into my neck. "I told her she was beautiful, and if you could go to bed with Angerboda, then she surely could find someone." Loki pulls back, stares at me in surprise, and then falls back onto me in a fit of laughter. I frown and watch his shaking form. It would seem, Hel and Loki are more similar than they realize.

"You're still jealous of her even after all this time? You silly creature!" He reaches up and takes my face in his hands. He gives me a long kiss. "Surely you know it was all to bring us together. She bore three children before you finally declared me for yourself before everyone."

"It was obvious and you knew how I felt. I knew how you felt. There was no need for you to make a public claim. You just wanted to cause some trouble," I remark, rolling him over.

"There were those in the court who questioned us. That proved to everyone that not only were you mine, but I was also yours," he explains as he positions my hips above him. "Now, no one dares question who we belong to."

"That's practically what I said to Hel when she asked again if we were going to get married." Loki groans as I lower myself onto him, but as these words leave my lips he bucks into me and gives me such an intense look that I whisper his name in surprise. He reaches up, cradles me into him, and lowers me back onto the bed before continuing with a passion that nearly drives me mad. When we are both spent, Loki braces himself on his elbows above me.

"I want not just the court to know you are mine. I want everyone to know. I want all of Asgard to see us together. I am King and you shall be my queen," he declares. I smile and run my hands through his hair. Such an impulsive man.

"When?" I ask.

"We'll announce it to mother tomorrow."

"Tomorrow then," I affirm. Loki lowers himself onto the bed beside me and pulls me into his arms. There is no one else in the room, but the manner in which he is holding me seems as if showing someone I am his.

"You are my wife. No one else can touch you now," he whispers more to himself rather than to me. And for the first time in a long while, I do not correct him, but repeat his words to him, claiming him as my husband.

* * *

Notes: I decided to only include 4 of Loki's 6 children because those are the ones I readily had access to. I don't really know much about his other two sons and didn't feel like adding them in honestly. I'm too lazy like that, haha. I know my view of Hel isn't exactly as portrayed by others, but it is what it is. Its how I've always imagined her. Sorry this took so long to post. I finally have time now during the summer to write. Leave any comments if you have them, please!


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